I don’t fly super often, but enough times a year that I barely pay attention to the safety procedures anymore before each flight (sorry Mom). I’ll glance up from time to time and count how many seats before my closest exit, but that’s pretty much it. The rest I have memorized, including this important reminder:

Put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

How else are you supposed to help others when you’re passed out on the floor? Shouldn’t we take this same stance while not cruising at a high altitude? Doesn’t our well being come first? I ask this because lately I’ve heard myself say the word selfish a lot- “Am I being selfish? Is that a selfish thing to say?” Hoping that perhaps by asking, I can rid myself of the potential guilt from placing my mask on first.

Selfish isn’t a pretty word. It means that we are caring for our self without regard for others. But mindfully caring for ourselves and focusing on our own needs is simply demonstrating self-care. It’s reflective, healthy and important work. It’s staying intimately connected to what feels good and right in our bodies and minds, and following through. This has been the most powerful thing for me lately- finding something that feels good, and then DOING IT! Right now it’s running (I will admit, it’s still a little love/hate).

It’s the difference between “I’m working on myself” and “I need you to work on me.” It’s the difference between finding joy in an activity versus relying on the actions of others to make you happy. As long as we keep a healthy focus on ourselves while being compassionate towards others, we can safely replace the word selfish with self-care. And really, who wouldn’t want us to have a healthy relationship with ourselves? Anyone who says otherwise, is probably being selfish.

WTF is wrong with some self-care? I’m going to answer this time- Nothing. Absolutely nothing.