I used to do a lot of driving before moving to Philadelphia. I would take the same routes each day, pick the same tollbooths (I hate EZPass!), and mindlessly move through the habits of driving my car. There were many times I arrived at my destination having NO memory of getting there. Did I cut someone off today? Run a red light?! I didn’t know the details but I assumed the majority of my driving decisions were correct.

Now I feel like I’m in a similar position personally. I’ve reached this junction yet have no idea how I got here. Did I make the correct decisions to arrive safely? Was I conscious of the weight of all my decisions? Did I really weigh out my options? Is this whole crisis me just slamming on my brakes, looking around and saying,

“How the HELL did I get here?!”

I’m learning that we really are constantly evolving, growing, and discovering ourselves. Perhaps that’s obvious to some, but there was a part of me that thought once I reach a certain age, I’d at least have myself figured out. I feel like I’ve grown the most since the age of 25; this is scary yet wildly exciting to me. The opportunities and experiences that lie ahead are intoxicating, yet the idea that I could, and probably will, change drastically yet again makes me feel uneasy. The idea of navigating my future feels extra tricky knowing that future Adrienne could be very different than the current version.

How do we make decisions for our future when we don’t know that person yet? Do we have faith that our core values will carry us through? How do we stay present and not get lost in the journey?

WTF is the best way home?